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Important health annoucement

Posted: 06 May 2006, 21:00
by DispatchDragon
Alcohol warnings;

Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering

what the hell happened to your bra and panties.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you

are whispering when you are not.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in

dancing like a retard.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell

your friends over and over again that you love them.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think

you can sing.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe

that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them

at four in the morning.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you

can logically converse with other members of the opposite

sex without spitting.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of

inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees and

lower back.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that

you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than

most people.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think

people are laughing WITH you.

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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

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WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcahol may mack you tink you

can tipe real gode




:lol:

And I was actually half way through correcting the spelling on the last
one before I realised


Leif

Posted: 06 May 2006, 21:02
by Avant-Garde-Aclue
Brilliant :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Posted: 06 May 2006, 21:06
by Garry Russell
And so true................so a friend of mine tells me :roll:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Garry

Posted: 06 May 2006, 21:11
by VEGAS
Superb mate! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Posted: 06 May 2006, 21:22
by andy
Don't affect me.
I only drink on days with a "Y" in them............ :lol: :lol: :lol:

Posted: 06 May 2006, 21:29
by DaveG
I'm OK, I dront dink :lol:

Nice one Leif

Posted: 06 May 2006, 22:40
by Jetset
Excellent :lol: :lol:

Posted: 07 May 2006, 08:33
by Filonian
Brilliant Leif,

Would you mind if I used them in a newsletter I produce for my Mess
of the ex-sevice mob - link I posted earlier?

Graham

Posted: 07 May 2006, 08:38
by DispatchDragon
Graham

Feel free - Mumharding gave it to me to post as shes still learning
to use the forum - btw - you might want to send her a note shes
ex ATS/REME so she may be very interested in your organization

Cheers

Leif

PS her ATS photo is in the do you know these forum members thread


LOL

Posted: 07 May 2006, 09:49
by Filonian
Many thanks for the OK Leif. Always prefer to get approval, rather than "just doing."

Regards to your good lady - now know who keeps you in check :smile:

I am afraid, however, that we are one of the last "male bastions" - I think that's how they spell that last word :wink: - no ladies allowed membership :sad: :sad: :sad:

However, Mrs. Filonian is on record as saying in no uncertain terms,
"The day they let women join is the day you resign!!!" :crying: :crying: :crying:

Graham