I've told this once on AlphaSim but I think It's worth telling again.
A couple go to a fancy dress party in their village dressed as a pantomime cow. As it's only a short distance they decide to walk there in the cow costume. The husband as the cow's front end and wife at the rear.
Their route takes them across the local farmers field, half way across the husband sees there is a bull in the field and it's running towards them.
He tells his wife who say's " Oh no! what shall we do?" and he replies " Well my dear I'll pretend to eat grass you'd better brace yourself".
Seems Michael was right to forewarn us about the quality of the jokes! 